Which pebble are you?
Perhaps that sounds a bit daft. What do I want to know that for? How does that help? Much like how the traditional counselling questions can feel: ‘How do you feel?’, ‘What do you want to talk about today?’, ‘How can just talking make any difference?’.
But this is what can make a real difference in our lives.
I love pebbles. Each is unique. Each its own shape and pattern. Each with its own history engraved on its surface. Each has its own power. I love looking at pebbles and seeing them as they are, without wishing they were something else, without needing them to be something else, without pretending I am myself anything but awkwardly unique, bruised and shaped by my own history.
As with pebbles, so it is with people. So, which pebble are you?
Maybe you’re the one at the top of the pile, sparkling in the sun. Perhaps you’re buried deep, unseen, unnoticed. Or the pebble worn out by wave after wave of grief, anxiety or depression. You might be jagged and rough, struggling in patterns that hurt or push away those around you. Or maybe you’re the pebble hollowed out by addictions or by feeling, 'What's the point?'. Perhaps you’re not any of these. Perhaps you don’t really know what sort of pebble you are.
Whatever sort of pebble you are, I provide a safe, confidential space to discover and express yourself - and all that's going on for you right now.
There won’t be any pressure or judgement to be anything other than you. Just acceptance. And in return, I won’t pretend I’m anything other than another unique, awkwardly-shaped human pebble too.
Because I know that when I feel recognised and welcomed as I really am, by someone who is just being who they really are, real change is possible. I belong again. I'm OK again. When our situation, our pressures, our histories, our feelings, our scars are seen - and not just seen but accepted for how they are - then we can really become something different. We can learn to recognise and accept - and yes, even value - ourselves. And then I know we’re on to something powerful.*
*This is fundamentally a person-centred approach to counselling as developed by Carl Rogers. I summarise it as real transformation occurs through love because this unleashes the power already within us for flourishing. Nevertheless, I am very happy working in a more CBT way if that is what a person needs, and I find agreement with a lot of relational psychodynamic and systemic approaches.
If you'd like to explore counselling ....
I offer a free, 30-minite initial session on Zoom where you get to meet me, ask any questions and we can explore working together. Just fill out the form below to arrange a session.
If you have other questions about counselling, the articles below may help - and also feel free to ask me directly by getting in touch below.
To explore more of my work...
What I'm learning about life and living. Topics cover fatherhood, meaning, emotions, relationships, faith/spirituality and manhood.
Getting in touch...
You can get in touch by phoning, emailing or submitting the form. I usually reply within 24 hours (unless its the weekend!)