6 days agoThe tyrant withinProcess groups are hard. If you’ve never attended one (and they are a counsellor-y thing to attend!), they are, in effect, a group of...
May 4UkraineMerely the word evokes so much feeling: terror and pride; grief, horror and floundering confusion; compassion, camaraderie as well as a...
Mar 16Searching for meaning?It seems to me that the more we search for the meaning of our lives, the more it proves both necessary and yet elusive. The pain of this...
Mar 9Finding Our Meaning AgainLife is full of meaning and emptiness. Acknowledging this paradox of the human experience and our experiences of it is necessary for...
Mar 2Empty and full: living with the human condition‘Meaningless! Meaningless!’ says the Teacher. ‘Utterly meaningless! Everything is meaningless.’ (Ecclesiastes, 1:1) Another rendering is...
Feb 16Depth perceptionWe’re used to seeing in 2D. Social media, TV, newspapers (if anyone still reads them) crush humans onto a 2-D medium. And often not...
Feb 9Learning to be trustworthy III: learning to still hopeCan I trust you? This strikes at the heart of encounters. ‘Can I trust what you say? That you won’t let me down? That you care? Do I need...
Feb 2Learning to be trustworthy II: learning to be reliable and competentTrustworthiness is perhaps the most crucial characteristics for being a therapist¹. Trust is perhaps the most crucial characteristic for...
Jan 27Learning to be trustworthy I: Learning to be honestI don’t trust you. You can’t be trusted. Such accusations hit us hard. They strike right at our sense of who we are. We often react with...
Jan 19Doing MeThis week I was sharing with a colleague a struggle I was having at work. They’re not a therapist, but their response was as good as it...
Jan 13Wondering about dreams: finding clarity in the murkiness Dreams can feel rather mystical. What do they mean? Are they trying to tell us something? What’s it saying about me? If we come from a...
Jan 6Just One Thing: A New Year's DemandIt’s the New Year! And I wish I had some resolutions I could believe in. Believe that I could, with some renewed determination that...
Dec 16, 2021How to deal with Christmas stressBrené Brown has an insightful definition of stress The Atlas of the Heart: We feel stressed when we evaluate environmental demand as...
Dec 9, 2021Ordinary Tea. Ordinary lives.I would quite like a teapot at the moment. Not a big one; ideally, just big enough for two average-sized mugs. I have an image in mind,...
Dec 2, 2021The tyranny of happiness: why positive psychology needs to see its shadowWe had a staff training day a while back. It was about happiness. Sounds lovely, doesn’t it? I was excited about a day purely focussed on...
Nov 24, 2021Is religion good for your mental health?I remember sitting on my bed one evening. I’m 11, looking up at the stars: ashamed, alone, unable to talk to anyone about it. You see, I...
Nov 18, 2021Being "spiritual" - what does it mean?In my lifetime, being ‘spiritual’ - as with many previous taboos - has become acceptable, endorsed, validated, even fashionable. I find...
Nov 11, 2021How to find a counsellor you can trust.I hate finding a car mechanic. I know next to nothing about cars. I often feel like the people I speak to think I know more than I do. So...
Nov 4, 2021DisappointmentMy heart sinks. I had hoped. I had made tentative steps. And then the door slams in my face. The path gives way before me. Was I a fool...
Oct 28, 2021The healing encounterSome meetings feel different. They have a quality about them that touches us, renews us. They seem to heal or bind up something within....